Thursday, December 7, 2006

The Christmas Letter - 2006


**Disclaimer- this might be a complete waste of your reading enjoyment. But we couldn’t “stomach” NOT sending a Christmas letter. I did put different fonts and
pictures to keep it fresh and interesting.
As many of you know, each year I try to bring a bit of humor in our Christmas letter. However, this year, we are just way too busy to think of something funny. We are about ready to remodel our existing house which will take us down to about 900sq ft of actual living space which isn’t funny for a family of 5, and tearing down another house to build our new house at the same time which is fun, but not funny and a bit stressful. really, there is nothing funny in our lives except realizing

people will buy ANYTHING on Craigslist. We learned this when we saw someone walk away with our toilet, actually the previous owner’s toilet. The buyer was so excited!
Here are a few things I thought I’d share about our near misses, lessons, and perhaps a few other interesting tidbits from the Spears of 2006.
Near miss- true story We almost bought a home that housed 6 elderly people and managed to talk a bunch of “our friends” into the idea that it was a good move for us. THANKFULLY, after 3 weeks of intense training, an EKG resulting in nothing but “stress related arrhythmia” (how embarrassing) and mentally moving in and decorating, we mentally moved out suddenly when the deal fell through. Basically, I didn’t have enough experience with the elderly other than hugging my own grandparents for 18 years. (If only I would have helped them to the bathroom a little more). But we feel that we were saved from a journey that would have ultimately led to me hissing at my husband for the next 20 years. We know that there are certain “callings” on people’s lives to do this sort of work and they get paid very well, however, the phone didn’t ring for us on this one- thankfully.
Vacation Lesson
Online booking for travel can be a great way to go. But be very wary of the honeymoon cottage” if there are no photos online, and your confirmation is written on a doily with handwriting that looks a little shaky. Yes,our dear sweet “100yr old” innkeepers still had their clothes hanging in the closet! After scanning the place we quickly checked for dentures floating in the glass cup, but only found crossword puzzles and a giant 1940’s organ. We were “overjoyed” to find these little creatures on our DOUBLE bed that obviously symbolized “welcome”. Laying down to sleep as our feet hung over the end, nearly touching the 1970’s faded green shag carpet, we thought “how nice it is to be in Colorado just the two of us, snuggling in a well used afghan. Maybe we’ll get some Cream of Wheat and Postum in the morning.”
“Let’s build a tree house for the kids”. I found out “build” doesn’t mean the same thing to me as it does to Ward. Ward’ s mind (being the outdoorsman), thought “build” meant “hoist” thus we ended up with a tree fort held up with rope and carabiners, something you might see on the side of Mt. Rainier. My “homey’ touch was the white canvas. The kids had fun in it for about a week and our new neighbors behind us were wishing they would’ve signed that Homeowners Association petition, BUT they didn’t!
Other family facts and points of interest.
Ward – likes to eat out. He finally graduated from his MBA program after 6yrs!! Courtney- still a horrible cook. Received a certificate of completion of the “Care-Home training” after 3wks. woo hoo (result of paragraph 1 fiasco) and finally released a 2 yr CD project. Both of us are really proud of our latest accomplishment of watching the entire 4th season of “24”.
A- 8 and in the 3rd grade, plays softball and starting basketball, loves the “Cheetah Girls” and accessorizing for school (right before we need to leave which is not funny or cute), doesn’t like any food except school lunches, Grandma’s pancakes and Chinese food.
L - 6 – afternoon kindergarten, plays soccer, loves Legos, comic books and still using training wheels (not funny, but it’s our fault), also likes Chinese food.
O – 5 and home with me, misses the other two while they are at school. Loves the Cars movie but insists on wearing the same “Cars shirt” every day…(not funny)! Oh yeah, likes Chinese.
Fish- surviving in green algae pool, we’re not sure how many are in there. (I know, not
funny but I really don’t care about the fish and they keep re-producing so they must be okay) Hamster “Mia”- Has gotten out 3 times (each time in the middle of the night) and always comes right to our room!! (Not funny to me, but funny to the rest of the family) The $35 Hamster Condo has obviously not been enough activity for her. I have yet to touch her.
Well, that is it. We have enjoyed getting your pictures and cards. We look forward to another year and hope that your family is healthy and safe this coming year.
Please keep in touch by either calling, emailing, or sending money.
Merry Christmas!! The Spears

1 comment:

  1. Hey Funny Girl, You're life is like a hilarious hit 50's television sit-com! You two are the Lucy & Desi of the 21st Century! A lot more of these letters and you got yourself a nice, little book filed under "humor" at Borders!

    But I am rather sad by the fact that I have never received a Spears Family Christmas Letter ever! Oh, if I could only be a fly on the wall at your home... how wonderful that would be!

    You guys are the greatest! Thanks for your stories... and keep making us laugh! :D